Another fucking flowchart.

Our Podcast is Hot

I just checked the stats on our podcast, and in one week our last episode has almost hit 40 downloads which is what we normally do in one month, so I just want to say thanks for listening, and for the support. Let us know that you love the show by leaving questions or comments on the blog. Thanks dudes, and dudettes!

Dead Space(The Real Game of 2008?)

Summer is the finest time to catch up on games that you might have missed last year, and I have been playing a lot of great stuff this summer. I cannot remember the last time I've wanted, and yearned to keep playing a game as much as I did while playing Dead Space. Usually when I receive a game from Gamefly it takes me a week or two to get bored, but I played through Dead Space in three days, and have already started a second play through. It's really not that long, but it takes me forever to finish games, so I was completely shocked to have finished it so quickly. I try to avoid scary games because I don't like to get scared, but it's not really that scary. There are just a lot of cheap scares, but Dead Space is a fresh, and engrossing experience that I would love to relive again. I don't have to say that the game looks amazing, but the things that really stuck out were the sound effects, the combat, and the interface of the game.

Most people tend to forget about how important sound is in a game, but in Dead Space it is very difficult not to notice it. Faint whispers coming out of the distance, the creaks of a spaceship, the sound of shooting a pistol in the vacuum of space. At times I stopped depending on my eyes, and I would try to just listen to anything I could hear to help me determine if there was an alien mutant around the corner, but even my ears deceived me, so I ended up just being on edge the entire time.

The combat is a little different from most conventional third person shooters. Instead of just pumping enemies full of lead, or focusing on head shots, the game actually punishes you for doing those things by releasing many tinier alien enemies that get all over the place, and are really fast, hence making them really tough to kill. The fastest way to kill enemies is by dismemberment. Careful aiming is critical to survival, so that's a nice little mechanic that the developers came up with. Things got really bad when like 5 enemies would surround me because I would just scream, and shoot my pistol almost in a blind mess, but using your Stasis power, which slows down enemies, and objects, really helps you focus on shooting limbs off.

The way the developers integrated all of the menu's, life bars, and weapon meters into the environment of the game was so sick. Once you start your game, the only noticeable loading time is in-between levels, so you are in this gargantuan abandoned space ship the entire time. There is no pausing to go into and out of menus. Your inventory menu, and map are all on a "Minority Report" style interactive touch screen that pops up in front of your character. The fact that the game never pauses also works to your detriment because you can be attacked while looking at your map, or your items so I was annoyed at times because I would try to heal while fighting enemies. I didn't know until after I finished the game that there are hot keys for healing, and refilling your Stasis meter, so I guess I was making it harder than it should have been. Anyway I just really liked that the developers really focused on not taking you out of the experience.

I would easily put Dead Space into my top 5 of 2008, but I struggle with the idea that it was the best game of last year. I'm stupid because I think more is better. I know that more is not always better. Can I really say that Dead Space was better than Fallout 3? Left 4 Dead had probably the least content of all the games in my top 10, and it took the number one spot. Well, Dead Space was easily better than GTA IV. It was stupid to put that game at number two, but like I was saying, at the time I thought, "Ehh, it was alright, but there was so much content, I put in so many hours, yadda yadda yadda." Yeah, the game took me 9 hours to beat, but there was so much there in terms of gameplay, and experience. Definitely Dead Space is in the conversation for best game of last year, and everyone should play it. Especially now that it's almost a year old, and you can pick it up for $20 at most stores.

My impersonation of Monday

Evie Sands - Estate of Mind

Classic blue-eyed soul.
http://www.sendspace.com/file/8otjat

California, what's up

California, look me in the eyes.
Stand up, Redwood trees
and the saplings filled with hope
to obtain thousands of leaves.

Take a look at your sons
and your daughters
where a drought is as certain
as running water.

With the Spicoli stereotype
and the birth of Soul On Ice.
Where Chaplin made a living
like Ice Cube does in another city.

Where Polly Klaas kept me
awake at night.
Emperor Norton
made sense sometimes.

Ask us questions
and we have the answers.
The people
that you born have mattered.

Woody Guthrie's guitar,
the opening bars
of Amerikkka's Most Wanted.

Cesar Chavez is more
than just a middle school.
Watts is more than just
a setting in a rap song.

California, look me in
the eyes when
we talk to you.

THE GE SMITH IMPERSONATOR

So, like, I'm this G.E. Smith impersonator. You don't know who that is? Well, I'm not exactly a hot commodity. But I'm good and I'm talented. Well, G.E. is, not me. I guess by attachment I am as well.

G.E. Smith was the lead guitarist for Hall and Oates and was musical director for Saturday Night Live for awhile. Yep, you guessed my job research includes Wikipedia. Real cool job, not many gigs. And it's not like G.E. Smith is unpopular it's just that he's not really someone you need an impersonator for. But you know, it's ok.

People ask me why I am a G.E. Smith impersonator and I tell them it's because I look like him. Because I really do. People have told me at certain (very rare) times that I look like this dude on TV. And I say okay, G.E. Smith?

And I don't know, it's like a 30/70 chance that they are aware of who I am (or who I look like) but it's still cool. Being G.E. Smith is like breathing.

So I'm sitting here, just being me - Brutus Birnbaum - while being G.E. Smith and I tell you sometimes I really get into character and it's cool because he leads such a private life that you don't really have to do an impersonation, you just assume he does certain things. One day I assumed he really liked those pizza rolls so I imagine like myself doing pizza roll commercials.

I once watched tiny molecules, or was really into the study of anything at the cellular level. I loved how the shape of squamous epithelium was so sinewy. That is my dream job. To just find the true Book of Genesis in a glassplate under a microscope.

There was a day in my life when I had woken up, thinking about waking up. Acting on my waking up and marching to Point A and then Point B and then yes here and here. And that was the day I became a G.E. Smith impersonator.

Damn These McDonald's Angus Burger Commercials

I really want to go right now. Nothing's stopping except my will.

THE CORRESPONDENCE CAST 8: Ya Sleep on Usss...Ya Sleep 4evaa...

Strap in kids, this joint is mad long. The longest in Correspondence Cast history in fact. We had to make up for being on hiatus. Lots of rambling. Pierre defends T-Pain(twice), Philadelphia the game, comic strips, and Clare stops by to add a womanly touch to the whole show. The episode 1 crew is back! Shout out to all the peoples who have been listening/reading. You can leave a comment or question here if you'd like, and go to the iTunes store and subscribe to our show. Tell a friend! Thanks for listening.

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So You Think You Can Dance Final

I really wanted to live blog the finale, but thanks to some ghetto fuck face I don't have a laptop anymore. I fancied the idea of running back, forth from the wifey's room to the TV room, but whatever. I thought I wouldn't like it because it was a 2 hour show, and you know, typical reality competition finales are just clip shows of the past season. However, I was really pleased because they basically had all the dancers come back to perform some of the best routines of the season. Sounds like a clip show actually, but it was a live clip show. Heh? Eh? Anyway check out the finale if you can.

I'm really glad Jeanine won. She is very versatile, strong, and danced every style well. She was my second favorite girl, which brings me to my point. Everybody knows that Janette should have won. Despite how versatile Jeanine was, Janette was the reason I kept coming back to the show. I wanted to see what she was going to do next. I don't know what the fuck happened with the voting, but my guess was that a lot of Janette's fans were thinking how I was thinking. "Eh, I don't need to vote. How can Jannette not win?" I never ever vote when it comes to reality competitions, and I hate it when someone tells me that bullshit about, "Your Vote Matters" or whatever. My vote would not have been worth two flying fucks. I alone could not have saved Jannette. Look, I don't know shit about dancing, but a few of the judges even said that Janette was their favorite, and were shocked as I was when she got sent home. If these professional dancers, and choreographers say she was the best then I'm not fucking crazy. Anyway, I enjoyed watching this show, but I hate how I always leave a little fucking disappointed. Same thing happened with Idol this season. Like I said though, Jeanine was my second favorite so I can take some satisfaction in her winning the competition.

Winner Jeanine

Janette, who should have won, dancing with 2nd place winner Brandon