HAPPY THANKSGIVING (The day after the fact: Final post, promise)

I've sat in and around, my DSL connection screwy as fuck, trying to post. I went to Margaux's for Thanksgiving with her family and pigged the fuck out and caught up on some choir singing reality, watched the first season of "Taxi" and fell the hell asleep in someone else's bedroom.

My DSL connection is stupid in a pejorative sense (not in the hyphy sense) so believe you me I would've called, interrupted your beautiful routines and wished you happy thanksgiving in a sober state.

It feels obligatory to post the things you are thankful for but I'm not really up for it because in all honesty I am thankful for everything, really, and that would be too short for a list. Even the things I kind of resent or am currently figuratively giving the **SHAKES FIST** at I don't mind I just rather they vamoosed.




I've lost track of time doing the patronizing dance, doing the jig, jive soft shoe for the inconsiderates and the indifferent. I've attempted to stop putting up with it, or at the very least lower my tolerance. If someone wants to usurp every precious ticktockery the clock is willing to allow us humans for the sole purpose of their bullshit then I seem more willing to indirectly call them on it or at the very least cut short their time although I'm not gonna front like I'm not terminally a pushover. I admire their candor and in a different circumstance I would spend enough time to relate with them on a "HEY I LIKE THE SOUND OF A MARBLE BALL ROLLING ON WOOD FLOORS TOO" sorta way.

Basically I am thankful for everything.

Mouthwash by Kate Nash




2Pac died when he was 25 years-old but if I look back it felt like the guy was at least in his 30s, with what he went through though his mindset was definitely a guy in his early-to-mid 20's. I know for a fact he'd have cried on November 4, 2008 or at least is crying in Cuba with an Obama shirt on.

He's done a whole shitload more than most people in a quarter-century of a lifetime. I pour out some mineral water for that guy on Thanksgiving.

If I really forced a list of what I am thankful I guess I would definitely put "the internet" on it for reasons that have made me enjoy the internet this past week. You kind of forget how catching up doesn't have to be making new memories by continuously stringing together past memories, a pastiche copy + paste sampling of previous moments and instead creating new ones, inventing new ways to feel human rather than remembering we once were human.

Taxi after Thanksgiving dinner: although that television show hasn't aged badly at all, what I will remember far more than Danny Devito dropping verbal assaults on all people taller than him will be the image inbetween the television and me, a collective group of people that decided they will share their time with each other sitting and laughing.




Maybe one day we will travel time or find extraterrestrial creatures or cure cancer or make babies using that Demolition Man contraption that Sandra Bullock and Sly Stallone used to do it (and do it and do it well. I represent Queens she was raised out in Brooklyn). But to be honest with you nothing can trump human accomplishment than making someone's heart swell.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING (con't.)

Saved by Bob Dylan (live)

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Hope your holidays are warm inside and outside. Hope CJ and Estrella's engagement party is the same.

This is the best picture ever and I just really needed an excuse to post it everywhere I go.

Too Lazy to Make a Cohesive Post

I'm copying your format P. It's lazy, but reading your last two posts enticed me.

-My Xbox just left Missouri on it's way to Texas to get repaired and gain another year of life before it dies again, but that might be wishful thinking. I track that shit on UPS constantly(I'M SORRY I HAVE NOTHING IN MY LIFE)

-It's starting to get really cold, but we haven't had any serious snow yet. Just some random flurries. I told some people back in California we were having flurries and they had no idea what I was talking about. They also said it was getting cold there as well. Like 50 degrees cold. So I said I hate you.

-I played a lot of Mario Kart Wii over the weekend, but I don't think I was in the right state of mind. I mean I had just lost my Xbox, so I played that game just to play something and I was being bitter and vindictive toward the game. It's not the Wii's fault really. I went back and forth feeling Stupid baby game, it's so easy to win I'm dusting these stupid babies, no challenge to Stupid baby game, why does it have to cheat, fucking punishing me for being so good, lucky babies. I really do love Mario Kart. I used to play the fuck out of it earlier in the year and it's the best online experience on the Wii because there is rarely lag, there's always people to play against, and you get to do a whole fucking race instead of being limited to timed matches like Super Smash Bros Brawl. Only being able to play 2 minute games in public matches killed the online experience in Brawl for me. At least in Mario Kart it feels like you played a complete game. That game is going to make the list for best games of the year for sure. You all know how much I like teh Kart gamez. I was the only one to get Double Dash on Gamecube, but we didn't really play it because I had no competition in that game. Playing Melee was more fun anyway, but I'm getting sidetracked by nostalgia as usual. Still the Wii's online interface is so fucking behind the times and too restricting. I wish I could yell at those mother fuckers who keep picking Luigi Circuit, but alas in the Wii space, no one can hear you scream. Xbox Live puts Nintendo's online infrastructure to shame.

-I am really looking forward to Thanksgiving. We will be going to one of Andrea's friends' apartment so I won't have to chop vegetables, although I guess I will offer my services. It's the polite thing to do. I'll get my hands on a 360 controller for some of the night because my friend Ryan has a 360, so I can get my a quick Gears 2/Left 4 Dead fix. Not only that but there will be football, good white people food, beer, wine, and leftovers. No fucking work. Oh man.

-CRAP CHROMEO WAS ON XBOX LIVE PLAYING GUITAR HERO 3 AND I HAD NO XBOX TO PLAY AGAINST THEM WITH STUPID

-I hate all the TV shows that I've been keeping up with. My DVR is full of stuff that I just am not interested in watching. Heroes is fucking repeating the exact same storyline from Season One. They see the future and it's the end of the world. They have to save Clare again. I am sticking with it though because I have a hard time dropping shows once I've invested in them. Grey's Anatomy though I wish I could stop watching, but I never will because Andrea won't stop watching it. Two words to describe the most recent episode: Ghost Sex. Yeah, really. Sanctuary is fucking hilarious because the green screen use is obvious and abundant. Life on Mars I thought I was going to get into, but I haven't watched past the pilot, but I have all the episodes on my DVR. The only shows that I still enjoy and have to watch are Jon and Kate Plus 8 because they're white and asian and have 8 fucking kids(The plot writes itself!), and The Office but even that is starting to fall off. It's still pretty funny though. I need to jump back on The Wire, and I hear How I Met Your Mother is really good, but I can't just start watching it. I'm neurotic and I need to start from Season One. 30 Rock too.

-Nevermind, I couldn't have played with Chromeo because I sold Guitar Hero 3 a long time ago. That game sucks.

Nothing in Particular: Quick n' dirty grab bag

-Esquire Magazine is celebrating their 75th anniversary by republishing their seven greatest stories online. I've read Tom Junod's "The Falling Man" and have seen the documentary, both probably the best 9/11 article that's been written, looking at the human factor in fine detail as opposed to broad strokes. I've heard really stuff about CJ Shiver's "The School" and I'm planning on reading that when I have time.

It also contains this.

-In the great mp3 breakdown of 2008 wherein my laptop is straight vegetable status I've lost a shitload of music, school documents, files, pornography that I hate having, a handful of words I was going to use for future projects and pictures that say 1,000 words each (most oft-used word of the thousands when seeing those pictures: "what the fuck...") and I'm trying to rebuild them. If any of you guys have "Stand On the Word" by Celestial Choir please please please send it my way and I will provide proper compensation (a polite "thank you"?). As an aside, "Don't Rush Me" by Jean Grae has been my pep talk song since I've moved to the Philippines and it's nice that it's released proper in a very well-made album with the sickest alternate album covers.



-Fantasy football is consuming me, yelling at the television, the laptop. Tony Kornheiser is annoying me and he's my hack journalist dog, parlaying average into entertaining so it pains me to say that he sucks in the booth.

-Probably the funnest blog around right now (read: not my favorite or the best) is 1001 Rules For My Unborn Son. I don't necessarily agree with everything, but conceptually its execution is kind of on-point.

-Dancing in your underwear: Great thing or the greatest thing?

-For some reason something abso-freaking-lutely inconsequential had me in a downer mood for like a couple hours until I started working on my dental shit and then played Out of the Park Baseball for 3 hours. If people were completely honest with everyone else then everyone would hate everyone but then you'd also have the balls to find out what you hope for is true. Am I making sense?



Scrooge McDuck, THA REALEST NIGGA ALIVE.

Nothing In Particular: The List

In no particular order, of no particular importance. An ongoing series of content that has been ruminating in my rum-pickled brain lately.



1. Some movies I would not mind watching

Four movies have been in my crosshairs lately and if you've been within earshot or laptop from me you will very well know they are The Wrestler, Role Models, Zack and Miri Make a Porno and JCVD.




The Wrestler: I've pontificated about that shit for awhile; redemption, Mickey Rourke, folding chairs, barbed-wire bats, etc. I'm a sucker for that has-been underdog story and sometimes if its good enough then I don't mind it being predictable.

People are hanging onto this angle that this is both Mickey Rourke's and Darren Aranofsky's comeback movies. Certain film fans think this is Aranofsky slumming it after the supposedly esoteric The Fountain bombed (I did not watch the movie but fwiw I wouldn't mind viewing that bad boy) and aiming for a more accessible movie.

To be honest, I don't really care either way I just want to watch the thing. The expectations in my head are way too out there and sometimes I think its because some wrestling fans crave for their stupid little fake fighting world to be legitimate in the eyes of others. Jeff Jarrett said it best when he said "For those that understand, no explanation is necessary. For those that don't no explanation will work."

Honestly, that's the stance I'm gonna take as to why I love this movie and its idea and concept before I've even seen it. I'm not scared it won't live up to my expectations like other movies I jocked hella hard because the fact that they got these people to make this movie seems like a victory already. Vince McMahon thinks that the success of The Wrestler will revitalize his show but it has nothing to do with wrestling and it has everything to do with being off-the-grid and being on the fringe of a society expecting that's hellbent on discarding you when you are of no use anymore. So yeah, I guess it IS about wrestling.


Role Models: Dudes from Apatow's crew, David Wain's "The State/Reno 911" crew, Stiffler, Elizabeth Banks (who seems like she's aiming for most girlfriend/wife characters in a span of a career) and that little black kid who makes me laugh.

Look at the rollcall, motherfuckers. Look at this resume of movies this collective has made separately and together:
-Wet Hot American Summer
-American Pie
-The 40-Year Old Virgin
-Let's All Go To Prison
-Superbad
-Forgetting Sarah Marshall
-Knocked Up
-Reno 911: Miami
-Stella
-Anchorman
-The State
-Friends
-Dude, Where's My Car
-Roadtrip
-Anchorman

That fucking list looks like a facebook/myspace favorite movie/tv list of your mookie-ass friend and/or your nerdy-ass riend who you love to death. And this, is why I am amped.


"When I am making love to my wife in a clumsy manner but rich with sarcastic and verbose dirty talk (aka Kevin Smithing it) I am thinking of your finely sculpted torso that diabolical wenches seem to take for granted. Damn you to Fuckville, the capital of Hell, Gwyneth Paltrow and Jennifer Lopez."

Zack and Miri: I've lessened my slurping the knob of Kevin Smith as I've gotten older, but it doesn't stop and although I'm really lukewarm to this movie I can't ever really drop some haterade on the dude (and I can probably think of a long-ass list of things that annoy me about the View Askewniverse but most of it doesn't involve filmmaking and I'd be a bitch to disregard something someone makes because because they intermittently annoy me AND IN NON-REAL LIFE TOO LIKE I NEVER MET THE GUY (i.e., Roman Polanski and Chinatown). Plus, dude introduced the world properly to Jason Lee and for that I can never completely loathe something as self-indulgent and kind of ridiculously livejournally a movie as Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back.



JCVD: Van Damme in the most meta fucking idea. Mind blown.